Tuesday, January 12, 2010
Monday, January 11, 2010
uhmmm
it's not that i want to be morbid, but i just can't help thinking those thoughts. i don't worry about when the day of my demise arrives, if it's near, i say come do what you came to do. but yet, i don't want to leave this world angry and sad, with full of hatred and regrets. i also don't want to die alone. so i want my last day on earth to be a happy one, with people that i love surrounding me, in flesh or in spirit.
i wasn't created by God to be useless. i deserve the right to be happy and right now i'm given the chance to set things right. i'm not going to let moronic people with their moronic comments get me down. i'll just say "FUCK YOU" and get on with my life. i used to dwell on the past, making myself much more miserable than before. but come to think of it, why should i be so dumb? it hasn't helped me, or anyone. so, yeah, i still see life as a dark, cold place. but somewhere at the end of this tunnel, a hint of light can be seen. and right now, it's getting brighter than before. if there's hope, everything will be alright.
i wasn't created by God to be useless. i deserve the right to be happy and right now i'm given the chance to set things right. i'm not going to let moronic people with their moronic comments get me down. i'll just say "FUCK YOU" and get on with my life. i used to dwell on the past, making myself much more miserable than before. but come to think of it, why should i be so dumb? it hasn't helped me, or anyone. so, yeah, i still see life as a dark, cold place. but somewhere at the end of this tunnel, a hint of light can be seen. and right now, it's getting brighter than before. if there's hope, everything will be alright.
munch on this
you know when you flip the newspapers open and read a devastating news, it could be about a rape victim being murdered, or someone who was killed during a robbery, and you think to yourself, this only happens to other people? well, you're other people to other people too. so i guess that what i'm saying is anything can happen to anyone. don't take things for granted.
on another note, people can be mean. i don't like humans. if i could reincarnate into anything i choose to be, i want to be a particle in the sky. no life. nothing. no pain. no emotions. just...a particle =)
and, i did some thinking. i guess i could forget the sins people made. it just depends on how serious it was. the more serious the situation, the longer it takes for me to forget. forgiveness comes easily to me, so i wouldn't worry about that
on another note, people can be mean. i don't like humans. if i could reincarnate into anything i choose to be, i want to be a particle in the sky. no life. nothing. no pain. no emotions. just...a particle =)
and, i did some thinking. i guess i could forget the sins people made. it just depends on how serious it was. the more serious the situation, the longer it takes for me to forget. forgiveness comes easily to me, so i wouldn't worry about that
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
alert! alert!
you know, being alone is pretty nice. i can't understand why some people hate being alone.
they say, to live a happy life, you have to learn to forgive and forget. i can manage the forgiving part, but never will i be able to forget the sins of people, especially those who have wronged me. don't anyone dare say that it's a waste of precious time in life to hold grudges. if you do, you'll be in my bad books for a very long time, eventhough you're doing that out of good will. yes, i will try my very best to forgive him, but i can never stop disliking him. you want my respect? earn it. i don't give it out freely, even if you're family.
great news!! my bother's coming home! gosh, it's been 3 years since i last saw him. he came home for 2 weeks after being abroad for 2 years. yeah, he hasn't been home for 5 years plus. it's going to be weird to have him home for 7 months. we haven't spoken for 3 years, not even through the phone, though he does correspond with my parents once in a blue moon through e-mail. it's like having a distant relative staying with you. you know you're family, but somehow you feel like he's more of a stranger and there'll be awkwardness. for sure. still, i love my bro =) lemme hear you go "awwwww....."
they say, to live a happy life, you have to learn to forgive and forget. i can manage the forgiving part, but never will i be able to forget the sins of people, especially those who have wronged me. don't anyone dare say that it's a waste of precious time in life to hold grudges. if you do, you'll be in my bad books for a very long time, eventhough you're doing that out of good will. yes, i will try my very best to forgive him, but i can never stop disliking him. you want my respect? earn it. i don't give it out freely, even if you're family.
great news!! my bother's coming home! gosh, it's been 3 years since i last saw him. he came home for 2 weeks after being abroad for 2 years. yeah, he hasn't been home for 5 years plus. it's going to be weird to have him home for 7 months. we haven't spoken for 3 years, not even through the phone, though he does correspond with my parents once in a blue moon through e-mail. it's like having a distant relative staying with you. you know you're family, but somehow you feel like he's more of a stranger and there'll be awkwardness. for sure. still, i love my bro =) lemme hear you go "awwwww....."
Sunday, January 3, 2010
2010, be good to me
happiness comes and goes. you just have to make sure that it comes more than it goes.
new year's eve. went to 1u for the countdown. major disappointment. so i suggested to my parents that we watch it from my aunt's apartment nearby. so we arrived with minutes to spare. i chose the master bedroom, had the best view. it's pretty ironic. i was supposed to watch the fireworks display with my parents, yet i was in the room alone. played "Hallelujah" on my phone, and just as the song started, the first firework was shot up into the sky, lighting it up with such magnificent colours. for the next 6 minutes, i was listening to my favourite song, watching the marvelous fireworks display and reflected on every major event that happened in 2009, the worst year of my life. seriously. i'm so glad that it's over. a fresh start to a new year.
i'm being very optimistic about the year 2010. please don't disappoint me. going through 2009 was terrible enough. oh, bring me the joy i need to keep me motivated in life!! truffles!! i need truffles!!
man, danny elfman is a musical genius!
new year's eve. went to 1u for the countdown. major disappointment. so i suggested to my parents that we watch it from my aunt's apartment nearby. so we arrived with minutes to spare. i chose the master bedroom, had the best view. it's pretty ironic. i was supposed to watch the fireworks display with my parents, yet i was in the room alone. played "Hallelujah" on my phone, and just as the song started, the first firework was shot up into the sky, lighting it up with such magnificent colours. for the next 6 minutes, i was listening to my favourite song, watching the marvelous fireworks display and reflected on every major event that happened in 2009, the worst year of my life. seriously. i'm so glad that it's over. a fresh start to a new year.
i'm being very optimistic about the year 2010. please don't disappoint me. going through 2009 was terrible enough. oh, bring me the joy i need to keep me motivated in life!! truffles!! i need truffles!!
man, danny elfman is a musical genius!
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